The relativity of pain…

So I got new ink recently and it got me thinking about the degrees of pain I’ve experienced over the past 15 years of getting tattooed. Naturally, thanks to my somewhat twisted mind, that moved on to other kinds of pain.

This latest road on the ink journey was my wrist. I will have to say it did smart quite a bit. My adorable tattoo artist had to smirk and comment that I was complaining a lot for someone who has a giant tribal on their back – “I don’t remember you complaining so much with that one.” He was obviously enjoying himself. I will admit that the one on the back of my neck was the most painful of them all. There is nothing quite like feeling the vibration of the needle in your teeth while you try to ignore the actual pain all at the same time.

This trip was a little different. Once we cracked a few jokes and had a few laughs, all while in progress, I remembered the lesson. I sat there and remembered why this band was being permanently marked on my skin. A broken band for a broken bond with a word to remind that life goes on. I didn’t feel anything again until it was done and that tingling of a fresh cut sunk in.

I guess this is where the relativity comes in, for me at least. When an emotion is so intense that it dulls the physical pain of something literally cutting into your skin – I wondered for just a small moment what natural childbirth would have been like. That was a fleeting moment however, blessings be to the inventor of the epidural and C-sections.

I realise that parenthood has made me quite a sap, emotionally speaking. There are many things that wouldn’t make me flinch – my friends and family have always been disturbed by these tendencies. My sister once decided that I was a sociopath (definitely another story for another time). Now, I find myself having to be careful what I watch on TV lest I find myself turning into a blubbering mess and climbing into bed with my kid just to hug him so the monsters in my head don’t get him. Yes, sometimes I feel like I’m going crazy.

Been having an exchange, sort of an argument, with someone over the past few days. Last night, against my better judgement, I started at the beginning and read all the way through everything we had both said. I was slicing a tomato at the time, with my ipad on the counter in front of me. I sliced open my hand and didn’t feel a thing. Little one came into the kitchen and asked me if my “boo boo” was making me cry. I had no idea what he was talking about till he took my hand and kissed it better. I didn’t know I was crying. He’s such a sweet, caring soul. I worry sometimes if this world will break him.

Life goes on. One day it won’t hurt. Until then, I’m just trying not to lose a finger.

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5 thoughts on “The relativity of pain…

  1. battymatilda says:

    Reblogged this on battymatilda and commented:
    Mummies are some of the world’s most extraordinary creatures aren’t they? They tend to our boo boos and kiss us when we’ve got chocolate covered faces, and glue in our hair, and they love us long after we’ve slammed doors and screamed that they will never understand. Since discovering WordPress and blogging, I have had the pleasure of reading some truly delightful blogs, but DisturbedAfterDark ‘s blog is one of my absolute favourites. In, K&J Take On The World, this mum shares with us some of the most hilarious and heartfelt stories of motherhood and her roller-coaster life.

    Everyone with a child in their lives, be ye aunt, mum, dad, older sibling or friend, knows that one question always leads to twenty more, and sometimes, skinned knees have extraordinary stories, but what makes her blog even more charming is the candor and effortlessness of the writing. Disturbed allows us to to remember that we are, all of us, more than the sum of our parts. She kisses boo boos, wrestles with big hairy dogs, bakes for preschool, writes, works, has a few tattoos and when all else fails – uses Steve Jobs to potty train.

    Funny and charming, but heartfelt too, Disturbed reminds us, that sometimes we carry the dull ache of a broken heart; that our siblings are more than genetic interlopers but comrades in arms. She shares her family, her recipes, her pictures and her stories. She comforts, as she entertains. I celebrate a woman who dares to be a mother, and herself too, as individual as she is whole.

  2. colinewalther says:

    Reblogged this on The Virtual Virtuoso and commented:
    I thought this was an interesting post, interesting take on pain, and I can relate to being afraid the world will break my little one, too. She is a teenager now, almost 18, and not so little anymore, but that is another story.

  3. Linda Joyce says:

    Hi there,

    I love this line: A broken band for a broken bond with a word to remind that life goes on.

    And, I’d love to more about it. Often, especially women, will internalize pain, and carry on for the good of the family, but unless we deal with it, it will rear its ugly head in a thousand different ways. And…one can die from a thousand tiny cuts.

    I caught 2 minutes of Dr. Oz today. He had a Happiness Expert on. She said that Happy People are…happier. They live longer, have less health problems, and don’t age as fast. The advanced photography drove the point home. Which says to me, all the more reason to work through emotionally painful events–the result is happiness in ones life.

    Smiles,
    Linda Joyce

  4. Author Catherine Townsend-Lyon says:

    A Wonderful Message to share with others. Pain can come in many forms….Good Pain of Child Birth, or bad pain like a loss of one. How we work through the pains of Life can vary from person to person, but when we WALK by Faith and NOT by Sight with the lord with us each step of the way, we can Endure anything! Blessings, Catherine 🙂 🙂

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